I want you. That doesn’t mean that I do not appreciate and love others, but sometimes I simply want you, you alone. It means I want to be alone with you and it means I need some time for us
. Because I love us, I love us in terms of us simply being
and socializing with others and sharing what there is to share throughout our days but sometimes I want us
even more. I want us to the point of truly, deeply just wanting us and I don’t know whether that’s possessive but you live in my brain too much and I’m probably overthinking this just as usual but it still comes back to being what it is. I cherish everything. I want you to know that. I cherish our mutual acquaintances and friends, I cherish our distinct moments throughout the day, I cherish the little gaps and the pauses and I cherish the flow of it all and I absolutely cherish the fact that you’ve made me part of your life and the fact that you’ve given me the opportunity to experience myself whilst experiencing and exploring the world of yours but, shit, sometimes I want you
so much. I choose you
too much. I love you
too much and, sometimes, just sometimes, the intensity is unbearable and I don’t quite succeed in not leting it transfix me to the depths of my soul and I don’t quite succeed in having to appear confident in myself and kind to the people we both care about when I know they’re not the ones to actually blame for my not being present or cheerful enough during such moments, and I am sorry for not pretending enough when I solely wish to spend a quiet, uneventful day of silence and lovely routine with you and I am sorry I am not sorry, I’ve been wanting you for so long.